Monkey see, monkey do.

I am old enough to remember Saturday morning Kung-Fu movies. They would come on and my friends & I would always watch them together. Immediately, after we would try to do all of the moves that we saw in the movies. I think, somewhere in the back of our minds, we knew that the moves were choreographed and probably involved wires and special effects.  We didn't care. We tried them anyway, jumping onto beds from the top of cabinets, trying 720 round house kicks in the air. Everything. Somehow, our brain registered what our eye had seen as possible and instructed the rest of the body to attempt these ridiculous maneuvers.

It's funny how humans work. If we see someone do something, we assumed that we too can that. It's true for all ages. I watched my daughter watch a program and right away try to mimic what she saw. She is also now following us, lock step, around the house and doing what she sees us doing. Fast forward to a woman two decades older, I witnessed a woman working at the Radio City Christmas Spectacular standing in hall, peeking through the door and imitating the steps that she was seeing on stage. It also applies to more than dance. It's true for dance, Kung-fu, and even running for office. If we see it, we surmise that we too can do it.

The interesting point comes when we feel that we can do it right away. No training, no practice, just get up and be what we see. Well, unless you have god-given talent, or you're some kind of aberration of nature, we generally can't. But we try anyway. We didn't care that there were men attached to wires that helped them fly from rooftop to rooftop in those movies. We jumped off the cabinet anyway. My daughter doesn't care that the Fresh Beat Band spent hours (kinda) working on their dance moves. She's going to attempt them anyway. A lot of us have no idea what it takes to be elected to public office. But we think we can do it better anyway. And what's even more dangerous, in a more familiar setting, is that we don't care that home improvement guy on TV has the backing of a major network, an unlimited budget, a nearby supply store, AND a crew with dozens of people. We're going to try to redo that kitchen by ourself ANYWAY!

There is no profound message here I think. It's just interesting to me how much power being able to see something has over our desire to go out and do it. Oh wait...there actually IS a lesson! Parents: be good examples for your children. They SEE what you do.

These are my thoughts...what are yours? 

Super Powers

"I wish I could fly!"
"I would be invisible."
"My power would be teleportation!"

Does this sound like a conversation that you have had in your youth? Or maybe you had it last week. It's an ageless topic since the dawn of fairy tales and comics: if you could have any super power, what would it be? The choices range from the common ones listed above, include super strength and x-ray vision, and vary as a far as the ability to find the best shopping deal in the city or lethal bile projection (someone actually came up with that once!). No matter what the power is, it belies a desire to be something special or to make an aspect of your life easier. But because they are so hypothetical, we come up with the most outlandish and improbable attributes....like killer bile. What would you choose if I asked you what real life ability do you wish you had?

My very first blog was about having many talents and not knowing which one to choose to pursue. It's ironic that I still wish that I had yet ANOTHER talent. I get jealous of anyone, especially men, who have this talent, and in particular, if they don't use it.

I wish I could sing.

Simple. And for clarification, I don't want to be a famous singer or use my voice for monetary gain. I just want to be able to sing to my wife and my child and have them enjoy my voice. Or sing at church (step one: join church). Or sing my fraternity hymn in key for once. Simple. Every time I see someone effortlessly belting out a tune at karaoke or just singing while working, I wish that I could trade one of my attributes for that one.

The funny thing is that someone who knows me may say, "why are you jealous of singers? You are a great photographer, orator, and writer. Surely, those talents are just as fulfilling as being able to sing." That brings up an interesting point: sometimes, the super power is just out of our reach and we have to just sit and appreciate those who have it. For instance, have you ever wanted to be a great cook like your mom? Does someone's ability to build things impress you and make you wonder why you can't do that?

Super powers are cool to dream about but what's that one, seemingly unattainable, skill that you wish you had? And how "unattainable" is it really? Is there a dream that you have put on the back burner? I know that if I took lessons, I probably could develop a good voice, however, there is NO room left on my plate. That's my excuse. Do you have one too?

These are my thoughts...what are yours?

Any ear will do...

Have you ever been out minding your own business and a random stranger strikes up a conversation with you? Before you know what's happening, they are telling you their ENTIRE "story" as if you are an old, trusted friend. I think it has happened to all of us at some point and if it hasn't happen to you, just wait. Pretty soon you too will have the joy of having to listen to someone pour their soul out to you and your only recourse being to grin and bear it. The sad part is that it's almost always a sob story, the old someone-done-did-me-wrong song. Today, in an elevator, a women said "today's a nice day. It's still nice even though I just got a pay cut!" As she got off, I stood there wondering what was that about and why she would even share that with me! Was there an applicable response that I was supposed to deliver? Would a "those BASTARDS!" made her feel better about her situation?

There is something underneath all of that: we as humans need to share our thoughts. The preferable option is to tell someone who cares, about them and/or the situation. Often though, some of us don't have that luxury and in those cases, any ear will do. Beware if it happens to be yours. The flip side of that coin is that there are people who PREFER not to speak to their loved ones for fear of judgement or reproach. We have a whole profession dedicated to listening to people so that they don't have to talk to their family and friends! When you spill your guts to a stranger, they don't know you enough to critique your point of view. In fact, if you're truly a random stranger more than likely you will just stand there and listen while as we rant and, for a lot of people, that's all we really want: someone to LISTEN while we go on about how bad our lives are. It makes us feel better. Kinda.

So the next time you get confronted with a drive-by counseling session, just listen and nod, or do what I do...try to out "whoa-is-me" them and tell them about how bad YOUR life is. Even spice it up and make up maladies! Let's see how they like it for a change!

These are my thoughts...what are yours?