"Out of sight. Out of mind." and "Absence makes the heart grow fonder."
We have all heard these maxims a thousand times before and most of us probably have subscribed to both these schools of thought. However, no two philosophies could be more opposite. It's that knowledge that makes some people scared to take time away from a normal routine.
Time away can be very useful. In the education field, professors have an optional sabbatical period built into their contracts, just in case they want/need to take a break. They understand that it is necessary to recharge. Sometimes stepping away from part of your regularly scheduled activities adds value to your presence. Allows people to see what their lives would be without you there and celebrate your return, thereby making you feel appreciated and validated. It the 'concept' behind couples taking a break...making the other person's heart grow fonder.
The greatest fear, however, is that the alternate saying will be the reality. No-one wants to feel that once they leave it will be as if they were never there. We all want to know that we bring some measure of worth to whatever we are involved in: class, relationship, group of friends. Unfortunately, there is no way to know and you may come back to a group feeling like they never realized you were gone, completely out of their minds. Musical artist go through this all the time. Many of them would LOVE to take a year off and enjoy all that money they are making. But they know that if they step away from the spotlight, even for a short period, people will forget that they were even here.
So what do you do? Do you take that much needed break or do you stick around, never knowing whether people value you or have grown accustomed to you being there. I tell my students all the time, "I can't miss you if you won't go away" and the same is true for everyone. Just leave. If no-one cares that you're gone then you have definitive proof that you need to be more impact-full with your life. If you are missed, you know that you're doing something right and you should stay on that path. Either way, you should come back to the group refreshed and with a clearer head and, if nothing else, that is worth the leave of absence.
These are my thoughts...what are yours?
2 comments:
I take a much needed break when I need it and allow everyone to miss me :-) I never used to do that, simply BECAUSE I knew people depended on me...but at my own expense. Never again.
I want to disappear but I have always felt like I would miss out on something. Even as a kid I was like that! I'm learning to take breaks though. My problem is that when I take a break from something, I replace it with something else and very rarely get back to the original thing! I'm a mess! I know!
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